


your love is my turning page

by bugselfs



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Betta Fish, Buffy the Vampire Slayer References, Dogs, Domestic Bliss, Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M, Pigeons, There is absolutely no angst, Uses The Word Sex Exactly Once, i wont lie to you
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-17
Updated: 2020-09-17
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:27:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,717
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26486398
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bugselfs/pseuds/bugselfs
Summary: “If it’s okay, I’d like to send an email to the rescue center. Ask about a meeting for her.”Dan pauses to mull it over, but it’s not even a full five seconds later when he says, “Alright.”“Good, because I already did, and we’re meeting her this Friday,” Phil says, patting Dan’s knee and scampering away.Dan wants to be upset, but instead, he throws his head back and laughs.or the one where dan and phil get a dog
Relationships: Dan Howell/Phil Lester
Comments: 3
Kudos: 29





	your love is my turning page

**Author's Note:**

> not me posting multiple fics in a week (and i miiiiight be updating some old ones soon) instead of disappearing for months at a time
> 
> also this story is basically just a PSA about the amazing breeds that are staffordshire terriors and american pitbulls

“I’ve always wanted a dog,” Phil says once, in the blinding light of the morning sun as it beams down on them through the glass door. They’re sitting at the table, eating cereal in a comfortable quiet while they watch Steve hobble around the patio, but of course, Phil can never deal without talking for too long. Over the sounds of their metal spoons clanking against the glass bowls, Phil’s lips itch to fill the silence. Dan doesn’t mind it, though.

“I know,” he replies smoothly. “What’s this about? Are you looking at dog pictures on Instagram again?”

Phil huffs a quarter-laugh. “No.” He shakes his head. “I was just thinking.” He pauses and looks down at his almost emptied bowl. “Fans want us to get one,” he adds.

There is a long moment of silence while Dan blinks at him. “Are you asking if we can adopt a _dog_ ?” His boyfriend looks up with wide, hopeful eyes, and Dan’s heart just about pings right out of his chest. Still, he relents: “Phil, _all_ of our plants are _dead_ . Not funny dead. Crispy, fried, capital D _dead_.”

“Not _all_ of them! The kitchen plant is thriving,” Phil says pointedly. “The only ones that are dead are in the extra room anyways. I’m a very loving plant dad. And I take great care of Norman. _And_ it’s hard to forget to feed a dog when the dog follows you around and cries until she’s fed.”

“Okay,” Dan agrees. “These are good points. What about: _We can’t have a dog, we never leave our home and usually eat dinner at midnight and breakfast at 3 in the afternoon_?”

“So she adjusts to our schedule. Or we adjust to hers. That’s not a big deal!” Phil is whining now, just about, and Dan knows his mind is set on convincing Dan. “And you go for a run every day!”

Dan’s lip twitches just enough that he knows that Phil knows he’s won. “Alright,” he concedes with a half assed sigh that they both know he doesn’t mean. “We’ll look into it.”

“Yes!” Phil cheers, pumping his fist in the air as he leaps from his chair and grabs Dan with one hand on either side of his face, planting a firm, celebratory kiss to his lips. “Steve’ll be so happy to be a big brother,” he adds as he rushes to the deck, off to tell the pigeon the good news. “And Norm, too!”

“Oh my God,” Dan mumbles, burying his face in his hands. He’s pretending to be annoyed, but he and Phil both know he’s just a bit bashful at the implication that he and Phil are _together_ parents. There’s this little part of him that forgets he’s 29, a grown man, no longer the scared 18 year old boy who would cry in the bathroom after having sex with Phil because he was so deeply ashamed of being the kind of guy who couldn’t help but fall in love with a man. How lucky the two of them are to be here today, talking over a shared cup of lukewarm coffee, pressing kisses into each other’s mouths and not feeling even an ounce of guilt about it.

* * *

It’s three days later when Dan’s phone pings a notification from Phil. He knows full well Phil’s meant to be editing, which is why they’re on opposite sides of the house, and this knowledge prompts him still his fingers on the piano keys, freezing for just a moment before he darts over and lifts his phone, expecting an emergency. Instead, he’s greeted with a link to a website dedicated exclusively to rescuing Staffordshire Terriers. Dan blinks.

_Shouldn’t you be editing?_ he texts back.

_I couldn’t stop thinking about dogs_ , Phil explains, and Dan shakes his head with a smile. _Click on the first photo!!!_ He adds a string of passionate emojis, which Dan rolls his eyes at, but he taps on the link and then on the photo of a coffee-colored staffie on the front page. It leads him to a description of her, a 3 year old named Buffy - because of course Phil is drawn to the only dog in the world named _Buffy_ \- with big, beautiful eyes that resembled hickory and pecan pie. He can’t help himself; he scrolls a bit further and skims through the paragraphs of bold text.

_Buffy is the most loyal, most loving, most squishable best friend any dog lover could ask for._

_She is hesitant around strangers, particularly men, but if you allow her to approach before attempting to pet her, she’s all love there on out; she just needs to trust you first!_

_Buffy’s ideal home would be with a family who are home more often than not, whether that means they’re homebodies, or that they’re simply working from home._

_Buffy has some behavioral issues, specifically severe separation anxiety, and if left home alone must be in a heavy duty crate as she will absolutely find a way to escape otherwise; she doesn’t mean to run away, she just doesn’t like to be alone._

  
  


“Isn’t she wonderful?” Phil asks, interrupting Dan’s reading. He darts up to look at the man standing ominously in the doorway, mostly just surprised he hadn’t heard Phil walking over. He must have been truly engrossed in Buffy’s biography.

“She sounds great,” Dan answers. “You like her, then?”

“Indoor dog,” he says. “Mellow. Lovely. She’s a rescue. And she has the _perfect_ name.”

Dan shakes his head, but he can’t hide the smile fighting its way onto his lips. “She’s pretty, too.”

“Isn’t she?” Phil beams and plops down on the bench beside Dan, his thigh, exposed from the sporty shorts he’s donning, pressing a long line into Dan’s sweatpant-covered. He leans in to pull over the phone that’s still in Dan’s hands, and Dan cranes his neck to see the photo on screen. She’s sitting on a field of grass, ears standing straight up and tongue pointed out. “Look at her eyes,” he coos.

Dan hums in agreement. “She’s perfect,” he admits softly. He can’t help it. She is. He imagines going on a run with her in the evening autumn breeze, coming home to Phil on the couch with takeout, who pats the cushion beside him and laughs carelessly when Buffy leaps onto his lap with joy. There’s a familiar tightness in his chest, one he always gets when he remembers that him and Phil are the _forever_ kind of love.

“If it’s okay, I’d like to send an email to the rescue center. Ask about a meeting for her.” 

Dan pauses to mull it over, but it’s not even a full five seconds later when he says, “Alright.”

“Good, because I already did, and we’re meeting her this Friday,” Phil says, patting Dan’s knee and scampering away.

Dan wants to be upset, but instead, he throws his head back and laughs freely, _so goddamn freely_ , because he will never not be completely and totally enamored by how well Phil knows him.

* * *

They meet Buffy and her foster parent in a park just down the road from the house. When they approach, donning masks which hide their smiles, Buffy barks gruffly at them, and Dan is reminded of her biography. _She’s afraid of men,_ he thinks. They’re not just any men, either; they’re very tall, very masked men. That surely makes it worse.

“Hi,” Phil greets the young woman brightly, despite the clearly anxious dog between them. “I’m Phil, this is my boyfriend Dan.” Dan almost flinches at the introduction, but a much larger part of him simply comes alive being referred to as _Phil’s_ _boyfriend_.

“Hello,” she replies, with nearly as much energy as Phil. “I’m Bonnie, and this is Buffy.”

“Hi Buffy,” Phil says, though he doesn’t reach out to her.

Dan asks, “How should we approach her? I know you said she’s nervous around men.”

“Right!” Bonnie answers, and leads them over to a park bench. “I’d say get on her level,” she explains as she loops Buffy’s leash around the leg, “and let her sniff you out. Don’t try and pet her, but I got treats for you to offer her.”

“Oh, thank you.” Phil beams, and Dan is just about blinded by it. “I went to the pet shop yesterday but I didn’t know what treat she likes.” 

Bonnie laughs at that and fishes out a small baggie of biscuits from inside her purse. “No worries. Think of it like a first date. And I think, since we’re far away from everyone, and I’ve got my mask on, you should take yours off, if you’re comfortable. She’ll warm up to you quicker.”

Dan then notices that she’s stopped barking. He wonders how long it’s been, but he thinks it must be a good sign. He lowers himself to the ground about 2 feet away from her and slides the mask down and lets it rest under his chin, and watches as Phil does the same. He picks out a treat from the baggie and holds it out in the open palm of his hand, waiting for Buffy to approach slowly. She inches closer and sniffs at his hand before her tongue darts out in lizard-like fashion and picks up the biscuit.

Phil barks out a laugh, which startles her, but not so much so that she seems anymore afraid than before. She looks up at him, and barks just once. _More_ , it sounds like, so Phil pulls out another biscuit.

“She eats like a snake,” he jokes, and Dan giggles beside him.

“Just like you,” he teases. Phil elbows his side, and Dan revels at the casual touches they’re so strangely comfortable with displaying out in public.

At that moment, she rushes forward and plucks the biscuit from Phil’s hand, but doesn’t pull away as quickly. Instead, she sits, now a full foot closer to the two of them.

“Well, aren’t you just the sweetest thing,” Dan coos, holding another treat out for her. She scoots forward another inch for the treat, which Dan willfully shares.

“Just like you,” Phil says mockingly, though his tone is far softer than Dan’s had been and a few notches quieter. Bonnie pretends not to notice the bright red blush on his cheeks, which Dan is eternally grateful for, and he throws his elbow into Phil’s ribs. Phil groans in pain, but it’s half-hearted.

“Can you tell us about her a little more? How much exercise she needs, what she likes to eat - that sort of thing?” Phil asks Bonnie with wide, shining eyes. Dan recognizes that look, and oh, is he in for it now; Phil has seen a world with Buffy the Staffordshire Terrier, and now he can’t _fathom_ a world without her.

As Phil and Bonnie go on, sorting out the details of Buffy’s needs, Dan just keeps feeding her treats mindlessly. He doesn’t pet her, even though his fingers itch to do so, but he does tune out from their conversation and tune into one with her. She barks once every few minutes, as if to tell him, _Another biscuit!_ Each time, Dan complies without a moment's notice. It goes on like that a few minutes longer until, all at once, Buffy closes the distance between her and Dan and runs the side of her face along the back of his hand. He can’t even pretend to hide the elated feeling that comes jutting out of his chest.

“Oh, gosh,” Phil coos, sliding his phone out from his back pocket for pictures. “Of course, she’s already fallen in love with you, hasn’t she?”

“Hey, this took a lot of work,” Dan scolds and slowly, cautiously, turns his hand to pat her head with his open palm. She does not pull away. “I gave her almost a dozen treats.”

Buffy approaches Phil too, then, bowing her head down to nuzzle at the hand in his lap. He lifts it hesitantly, but she buries her face into his hand like a cat, so he follows through and scratches just behind her ear. The way he laughs is like music to Dan’s ears.

“See, you’ve barely put any effort into it and she just walks right up to you,” Dan remarks. “You’re like Snow White, you freak.”

“She likes you both,” Bonnie corrects happily, “and I think you like her too.”

“We do,” Phil answers with an immeasurably sweet smile. “She’s _perfect_.”

“Isn’t she?” Bonnie sighs. “I’d love to let you two stay here and pet her forever, but I ought to take her home now that we know she’ll trust you. If you let me know before Wednesday, she’s yours.”

“We want her,” Phil blurts out. Dan can only nod.

Bonnie laughs and rises with Buffy’s leash in her hand. “Think it over. _Then_ call me.”

“Okay,” Dan agrees hastily, and Phil slides his hand over without looking to interlock their fingers. Dan pretends he is not afraid, and simply smiles instead. It’s better this way.

* * *

“It’s Tuesday,” Phil says quietly, when he’s still shielding his eyes from the sun underneath the covers of their bed. Dan hums, not understanding why that matters at this early hour. “We’ve got to text Bonnie today or… that’s it.”

“Oh,” Dan replies, morning voice evident through the scratchiness in his throat. “Should we make a list? Pros and cons?” 

He begins to lift himself out of bed, but Phil snatches his wrist before he can go any further than a few inches off the mattress. He tugs, and Dan flops back against the sheets with. “Stop it,” Phil insists. “I know that you know what the answer is.”

“Oh, really?” Dan asks, rolling to his side. “What’s the answer then?”

“Pros outweigh the cons,” Phil answers smoothly. He’s always been more confident in decision making than Dan is. “It’s her. Of course it’s her.”

Dan pauses, but nods. “She’ll have to go for a walk once a day,” he reminds Phil. “We don’t have dog food for her, or a bed, or toys - anything. We’ve got no plans set in stone. You’re sure about this?”

“Let’s go to the pet shop today,” Phil offers. “We’ll spoil the balls off her.”

Dan laughs, just like he always does when Phil says some weird shit he’s heard before on Twitter. “ _The balls off her_? You’re 33 years old,” he scolds.

“Like you’re any better, old man.” Phil snorts, pushing at Dan’s shoulder. “Come on. It’s pet shop time!” He climbs out of bed without another word.

A part of Dan is tempted to stay in bed and stare at the ceiling with a bashful, blissed-out grin for the rest of his life - just mulling over all the most perfect moments they’ve shared in the past 10 years together - but the sound of the shower running down the hall kickstarts his head into action. He throws the duvet off his legs and chases the smell of Phil’s body wash, as if he doesn’t plan on stealing it every day for the rest of his life.

* * *

Walking around the pet shop hand in hand is as invigorating as it is stressful. Dan almost pulls away a dozen times but forces himself to stay pressed against Phil’s side, knowing he’s better for it. He _wants_ to hold Phil’s hand, but it scares him; even so, today, in the quaint pet shop a few streets down from their flat, he chooses to be brave. He’s brave when he walks through the automatic doors and nods at the young woman greeting them, and when a fan approaches them for a picture and he keeps holding onto Phil’s hand (knowing full well it’ll be all over Twitter for the rest of the week), and when he checks out and makes polite conversation with the cashier. He’s even braver when Phil opens the door for him on their way out and Dan - having just scanned the area for passersby - pulls down his mask and presses a kiss to his cheek in lieu of a thanks. He tweets a picture of the flower piece they bought for Norman’s tank, just to feed the masses, and places the flower and his phone into the grocery bag.

“I still haven’t texted Bonnie,” Phil admits as they begin their trek home. “I wanted to wait until we finished. To make sure you were sure, and not just saying it because you know how badly I want Buffy.”

“I’m sure, bub,” Dan replies without hesitation.

“I know,” Phil says. “Do I just text her and say we want her? Should I make it formal and well spoken?”

“She knows you’re not formal or well spoken, it’ll be weird. Just spit it out, you spoon.”

Phil sighs. “Once we get home,” he compromises. “This crate is really heavy.”

Dan pauses and slowly turns his head to look at him. “Are you nervous?”

Phil blinks, avoiding eye contact in the way he does when he doesn’t know what to say. “Well, I…” he struggles. “Yeah, I suppose I am. It’s just, we’ve never had a dog before.”

“No,” Dan agrees. “But we have Norman. And Steve. And sometimes, when I have bad days, you bathe me and make me eat and take care of me. I think that’s fair for practice.”

Phil exhales in a way that’s probably meant to be a laugh. “You’re not a dog, Dan. I can talk to you. And have helpful conversations about how best to take care of you. Buffy can’t tell us what she wants or needs.”

“Not with that attitude, she can’t,” Dan retorts, but he stops walking anyways and pulls Phil off the pavement as much as he can without bumping into any buildings. “Phil. You’ve wanted a dog for so long, and you found one that’s miraculously named after your favorite character of all time. Isn’t that like, a sign, or whatever? What are you afraid of?”

“She needs people who really, really love her,” Phil admits, tears welling up in his eyes. Dan can’t see under the mask, but he knows how Phil looks when he’s upset, so he can imagine Phil’s hollowed cheeks and quivering lip as he tries to will away the sadness. “What if we aren’t enough?”

“We will be,” Dan insists, reaching out with his free hand to grab onto Phil’s wrist, which is just barely beginning to strain with the weight of the carrier. “You’re enough for me. And I am for you. And we’ll be enough for her too.”

Phil falters and nods, shifting the crate into the other hand and linking his fingers with Dan’s. “Alright,” he agrees. “I’ll text Bonnie when we’re home. I promise.”

“Good,” Dan replies and knocks their shoulders together as affectionately as he can.

* * *

The walk is short but feels like a hundred years in the summer heat, but the two of them - both very gangly and considerably out of shape - make it home in one piece, despite the sweat and aching muscles, especially on Phil’s end with the hundred pound crate he struggled to carry the whole way. Dan reassures him, of course, with a, “You look so hot when you’re sweaty,” although that doesn’t ultimately help much. Still, Dan sees the fond smile hidden behind Phil’s exasperated eye roll and he knows he’s done his job.

When they climb their way up to the living room couch and flop against the perfectly inviting cushions, Phil tugs his phone out of his pocket. “You do it,” he says, offering Dan no context or explanation - not that Dan needs it.

He unlocks Phil’s phone - since his face is saved as an ‘alternative identity’ - and pulls up Bonnie’s contact which is saved alongside a dog emoji. _Phil is so cute,_ Dan thinks, a passing but not infrequent thought. He begins typing the new message, backspacing where it seems too overdone or complicated. It takes a minute, but eventually he reads the final, unsent message aloud.

“Hi Bonnie, it’s Phil. If Buffy is still looking for a home, we’d love to invite her to ours. And by that I mean we already bought her a crate and a bed and so many toys, so please let us have her.”

Phil laughs and curls into Dan’s side. “It’s perfect,” he says, brushing his hand on Dan’s wrist. “I think you need to hit send now before I start overthinking.”

So Dan does. “Done,” he says, and tosses Phil’s phone onto the far side of the couch. “Now, are we being productive or hibernating?”

“I can hear Food Wars calling my name,” Phil says seriously.

“Phil,” Dan whispers and covers his mouth in an imitation of the television’s voice. “Phil, come turn me on.”

“Oh, ew.” Phil smacks Dan on the stomach where his hand was resting and pulls away. “I want coffee first.”

“This is your third cup,” Dan scolds but doesn’t make any effort at all to stop Phil. He never does.

* * *

Bonnie replies with a string of emojis less than half an hour later and Phil cries into Dan’s shoulder in relief. Dan holds him through it and pretends he doesn’t feel the same way.

* * *

Bonnie drops her off on a Friday afternoon. The sun bears hot and heavy on the London humidity, and Phil is sweating through his t-shirt and Dan can smell melting garbage on the city streets where they stand in wait despite his mask, but still, everything about it is perfect. When Bonnie’s car pulls in front of them and she waves from the driver’s seat, Dan fights the urge to flap his hands excitedly. Instead, he reaches over and squeezes Phil’s clammy hand and shuffles his feet.

“Hello, you two,” she says as she slides out of the car. “Buffy’s in the back. Would you two mind helping me get her out?”

“Not at all,” Dan says and rushes forward, arms extended in preparation. Phil follows closely behind, concealing his anxiety to any other watching eyes, but certainly not to Dan, who knows him better than anyone else. “How’s she doing today? Did the drive stress her out?” Dan asks.

“Oh, she’s quite alright,” Bonnie answers cheerfully. “I actually think she likes car rides. Kind of puts her to sleep, like a big baby.” Dan and Phil laugh, and as if on queue, Buffy barks through the closed car door. “Oh, she’s getting antsy,” Bonnie says and reaches for the handle. “She has her leash on already, but she might get excited and jump on you, so just keep on your toes, alright?”

“Alright,” Dan agrees, subtly shifting so he’s more able to run if he needs to. Bonnie pulls the door open, and Buffy does go running, but not very far at all; in fact, she jumps out of the car and takes two big leaps right into Phil’s arms, and miraculously, Phil catches her without even falling over.

“Oh,” Phil shouts in laughter. “Hello, Buffy.”

“Oh my god,” Dan says and rushes to pull his phone out. “Do not put her down, Phil, I need a picture of this.”

“She’s kind of heavy,” Phil whines, but doesn’t put her down at all. In fact, he pulls her closer to his chest, cradling her like she’s a toddler taking a nap in his arms and nuzzling his cheek into her nose.

“That is so precious,” Bonnie gasps and pulls out her phone too. “Dan, go with him, I want to get a picture for the Facebook page,” she instructs, and Dan agrees happily. He wraps his arm around Phil’s waist and leans his head in, sliding both their masks under their chins and beaming at the camera without an ounce of shame or fear. Just pure fucking joy.

“Well,” Bonnie says after she snaps the photo and promises she’ll send it to Phil. “I think this is goodbye for me and Buffy.”

“Anytime you want to visit her, you’re more than welcome,” Dan promises. “Really.”

“I’ll check in for pictures every once in a while,” she says, and reaches out to scratch behind Buffy’s ears. “Bye, Buffy. You got the coolest dads in the world, huh? One lucky dog, you are.”

“Thank you,” Phil says, and Dan pretends not to notice the tears in those blue eyes.

Bonnie sighs and Dan thinks he can see a smile crinkling along her eyes. “Oh, no, Phil. Thank _you_.” She pats Buffy’s head one last time and takes a step away. “Alright, I’ve got the food for you right here with her favorite toy. And you’re welcome to keep that leash and collar. If you have any questions, go ahead and text me. Vet recommendations, help with buying food, whatever it is, I’m here, alright?”

“You’re wonderful,” Dan says. “Thank you.”

She nods and hands the bag of food to Dan along with a little stuffed moose. “I’m so happy she’s going home with two people who love her this much. She’s a great family dog, too. Just so you know.”

Dan blushes and is immensely grateful the masks hide his red cheeks. “Thank you,” he repeats dumbly, and she laughs.

“Alright. I’ll talk to you two later.” She waves, and then coos, “Bye Buffy,” and turns on her heels to walk away. Absently, Dan wonders how anyone could foster a dog and resist the urge to keep them forever.

Phil doesn’t put her down as they make the trek up the stairs of their apartment, and Buffy falls asleep in his arms. Dan almost cries when she starts to snore.

* * *

The three of them are laying on a couch, Buffy curled up in Phil’s lap with her head on Dan’s thigh, when Phil’s phone pings a notification. It’s the picture of them with Buffy, and Dan hadn’t noticed before how perfectly she fits in Phil’s arms. Like a family.

“Should we tweet this as the announcement?” Phil asks. “Let the people know we’ve got a dog.”

“They’re already so overwhelmed with the book release, do you really want to put them through it all over again? Remember how they were when we got Norman?”

Phil laughs. “Buffy deserves to be shown off to the world,” he says. “I thought we could use this for a story post and a tweet.”

“I have a better idea,” Dan says, smirking mischievously. Phil narrows his eyes, but he’s smiling too.

* * *

The next day, Phil’s camera is set up in his usual spot, an impromptu video in the works. Dan and Buffy are standing directly behind the camera, ready to pop on screen upon their queue.

“We’re not going to talk about my hair today,” Phil mumbles, brushing his fingers through the unruly strands that are sticking up in a few different directions. “I’ve showered, like, four times today trying to fix it and it’s not working so we’re just filming anyway. You’ve known me long enough.”

“Anyways,” Phil giggles. “I have another video I’m working on that’s taking a while,  _ but _ something really exciting happened the other day, so I wanted to do a quick life update. First, Norman is truly thriving. Dan bought him a new flower for his tank a few days ago and now he’s even more posh than before. Steve is also doing great! His foot is completely healed and Scraggy has started visiting us every day with him, so I think we might be getting a little bird family soon.”

“And today, I have a very special guest. It’s someone who you haven’t seen in about four hundred years due to a very long hibernation, but he’s back on this channel for a once-in-a-lifetime announcement and his name rhymes with Stan Mowell, it’s Dan!” 

Dan cackles in the way he always does when Phil says something kind of stupid but objectively funny, and slides onto the bed next to Phil. He waves, cupping his hands like a beauty queen, and blowing kisses at the camera while Phil applauds dramatically. “Hello, internet, it is I,” he says, laughing all the way. Phil whoops beside him. “Been a while since I was on this side of the camera,” Dan notes.

“Yeah,” Phil agrees with a smile. “How does it feel? Are you gonna make diss tracks again? Ooh, should we make another Phil Is Not On Fire?”

“No and no,” Dan scoffs. “Maybe I’ll make a diss track about you. That’d be fun.”

“Just roast me for three minutes straight,” Phil laughs. “Alright, as much as we all love having Dan on the AmazingPhil show, he’s not just here for shits and giggles. We’ve got a mission today.”

“So ominous,” Dan mutters.

“It’s a very big announcement that’s going to make a lot of you very happy, just like it’s made us happy, so we wanted to share it with you together.”

On the count of three, Dan and Phil say together, “We got a dog!”

With the clapping and excitement, Buffy can’t help but bark at them and, as if she was summoned, she jumps on Phil’s lap like she had the day before. He laughs and Dan, without any shame whatsoever, takes the opportunity to watch Phil smile down at her. The audience knows how he feels about Phil. There’s no point in hiding his fondness.

“It’s not a prank this time,” Phil says after a too-long moment of silence.

“No, she’s actually our real dog,” Dan adds. “Her name is Buffy, and Phil didn’t even name her that, which is hilarious.”

“It was fate for us to adopt her,” Phil insists solemnly. “She was made to be our doggie.”

Dan scoffs and rolls his eyes. “She’s a Staffordshire Terrier and we adopted her through Staffie Rescue and she’s absolutely wonderful.”

“Buffy, say hi,” Phil coos, lifting her up to look at the camera. “I’m going to edit some of my favorite photos of her so far right here,” he says and motions his hand out where the photos will layer.

“When we had Bowie over for the video we made in 2018, Phil learned he’s actually allergic to dogs,” Dan says. “ _ But _ Buffy is short haired and she doesn’t shed very much so we’re giving it some time before we decide if Phil needs to take medication for it or not.”

“In the meantime, I will sneeze happily,” Phil says seriously. “So, yeah! This is Buffy. Um, she’s our new dog. And I’ll put in some videos of us playing with her right here.”

And then, they film the outro, Buffy still happily perched in Phil’s arms. “As you can tell, she’s very attached to Phil,” Dan teases. “I think I’m going to start filming her jumping into your arms every time you walk into a room and make  _ that _ my comeback to YouTube.”

“It’s so painful and so precious,” Phil whines. “Well, if you’ve liked this video and you want more dog-slash-fish-slash-pigeon-slash-Dan content, give me that thumbs up! I’ve also recently released some new merch so you’d like any of the ‘Ocean Cleanup’ collection to save some fishes, the link for that is down below at  _ AmazingPhilShop.com _ .”

“Moral of this video, go get a dog,” Dan says.

“Yes,” Phil agrees passionately. “Go get a dog. Right now. This is a sign. Go get a dog.” He laughs and shifts a bit, allowing Buffy to slide into Dan’s open arms instead. “Alright, I’ll see you all very soon, and goodbye!”

* * *

Half an hour before Phil posts the video - titled  _ Yes, I’m still obsessed with Buffy the Vampire Slayer _ \- he tweets a picture of Dan sleeping with Buffy on his chest and bravely does not caption it. Their viewers go nuts, which is unsurprising but still deeply entertaining to see, and Dan likes the tweet about ten minutes after it's posted just to keep the fun going. Perfectly on time, at 8:00 PM, the scheduled video is uploaded with an announcement tweet, and the thumbnail is a picture of Phil holding an outline of Buffy with bright green question marks scattered around his head. 

The final edit of the video includes clips that the two of them took on their phones. A few are of Buffy jumping full speed into Phil’s arms and him catching with her a pained laugh; some are of Dan and Buffy running in circles around the couch; others are sneaky ones, not unlike the picture Phil posted, where Buffy is sleeping, wrapped in the warm, muscular arms of Dan. The photos Phil puts in are equally precious, with a masked Dan on a walk with Buffy, the staffie perched outside the shower while Phil’s in it, Buffy and Dan slow dancing in the living room, Steve on his birdfeeder as he stares down at Buffy or Buffy with her paws on the base of Norman’s tank as she studies him.

The next morning, while the internet is still reeling over Dan and Phil getting a dog, Dan tweets a more private video of them where Phil’s eyes are closed and his head is resting on Dan’s shoulder, with Buffy stretched out across their legs. Quietly, Dan whispers into the phone, “I don’t think they liked the movie I chose,” and he flips the camera to show Steve, on the human side of the glass, curled up like a cat and burrowed in the rays of sun that flutter into the kitchen. Dan also shows Norman, who is happily exploring his aquarium. As he flips the camera back to his face, he opens his mouth to say something, but Buffy snorts like a pig, cutting him off. He throws his head back and laughs, which almost wakes Phil, but instead he tightens his grip around Buffy and pulls her closer. “It’s  _ barely _ 5:00,” Dan scoffs and shakes his head.

He captions the video a simple,  _ family time _ , with a little smiley face.

When Dan falls asleep that night, he dreams of 2009. Back then, he was so afraid. He never could imagine sharing such private pieces of his life with the fans. Now, he’s posting pictures of a sleeping Phil cuddling with their dog -  _ their _ dog, not Phil’s dog and not Dan’s,  _ their _ \- and openly calling them his family.

The next morning, Phil tells Dan he was smiling while he slept, and Dan’s not surprised at all.

**Author's Note:**

> the way buffy jumps into phil's arms is inspired by @hdbrosriley on instagram <3 it's free therapy <3 also this is an open invitation to PLEASE draw buffy and her dads, i would if i had any artistic skill but i do not so please i beg of you artists  
> 
> 
> here are some wonderful resources if you're interested in adopting a buffy yourself:  
> \- http://www.adoptapitrescue.org/  
> \- http://pitbull.rescueshelter.com/international  
> \- https://www.staffierescue.co.uk/  
> \- https://www.dogstrust.org.uk/
> 
> and here are some facts about staffies/pitties that i feel inclined to share:  
> \- the pitbull is considered the second most patient dog based on temperament tests  
> \- they used to be called the nanny dog because mothers would have them babysit the kids. literally.  
> \- their jaws cannot lock and they do not actually have a very powerful bite, especially when compared to german shepherds or dobermans  
> \- 6000 of them are euthanized a day, more than any other breed worldwide  
> \- they are extremely people-loving, more than any other breed; they begin preferring the company of humans over their mothers about 2-3 weeks before other breeds do  
> \- they're really cuddly and even the most energetic ones are total couch potatoes  
> \- the worst guard dog you could ever get because they are so friendly and love humans too much  
> \- they're short haired so they're largely hypoallergenic (unless you're allergic to dog slobber, and they're pretty slobbery)  
> \- the most common genetic disorders in their breed are typically non-fatal  
> \- a lot of staffies oink when they eat  
> \- have you seen a pittie smile. have you. it's free therapy
> 
> TUMBLR: strawberryphil.tumblr.com  
> TWITTER: @strawberryphll


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